Man is hunter

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Somehow I've become famous for my advice to other women when it comes to men. Well, maybe it isn't me that's so famous but more so my words of wisdom. Whenever I find myself in a setting where women are discussing men, more often that not, I find myself uttering the same indisputable advice, "man is hunter." Recently I was asked, what does that really mean. So I thought I needed to make myself clear.

Whenever a woman meets a man that she finds attractive, more often that not, she begins obsessing about him. I hate to use the words obsess but it is unfortunately accurate. According to Dictionary.com

obsess
ob-sess [uh b-ses]
verb (used with an object) ~ to dominate or preoccupy the thoughts, feelings, or desires of (a person): She obsessively wondered why he hasn't called.

When a woman realizes that man is hunter, she knows that she doesn't need to do anything to make a man interested. He will pursue/hunt her because that is his nature. He WILL go after what he desires. If he isn't calling her, he isn't interested. If she's wondering and thinking about him when he isn't around, she is obsessing.

I'm not saying that you're supposed to act like a powerless, helpless piece of prey. Quite the contrary. The analogy is there to illustrate how a man thinks. You're actually empowered by that knowledge

As a hunter, man is driven by the thrill of the hunt. This isn't news to many of us. Maybe some of us just need to hear it again in a more appropriate context. The harder he works for you, the more of a prize you are to him. He will not do anything to jeopardize a prize he worked so hard to get.

It's all about balance. If you are not a challenge, he will move on. If you're playing the hard-to-get game, he will move on. Men are simple. They don't know how to read the hard-to-get game. They get confused and move on.

So how do you balance it all? Well, it's simple. Focus on you. Look around you and enjoy everything that is in your life: family, work, friends. Think about things that you want to do and accomplish: career, hobbies, fitness, travel. Get out there and do things for yourself.

If a man comes along, treat him like a woman. He is now your new girl friend. He asks, "would you like to meet for drinks?" You reply, "sure." But this time, it doesn't matter how hot he is or how you will look like for that meeting or whether you're gonna kiss at the end of the night. You wouldn't think that if that were a new girl-friend so why him. Go out. Have fun. At the end of the night..."Thank you. I had a great time. See you later," says the positive, happy, and I-have-so-much-in-my-life-aren't-you-lucky-to-get-some-of-my-time you.

No need to mention "call me sometime" or whatever. If he's interested he will call. In the mean time, continue doing what you were doing before, which was focusing on your life and all the great things around you. Create opportunities for yourself.

If you enjoyed the company of your new girl friend and he's a fun person to be around, sure go ahead and give him a call to meet up. But unlike real girls, I doubt he'll enjoy shopping or sitting around in a coffee shop all day. Introduce him to what you've been doing. Maybe it's golfing or climbing or photography. That's the beauty of having a full life, you can share it with others.

It's a great time in your life to be SELFISH. How lucky are you to be able to be selfish. You go where you want to go; you live where you want to live; you take whatever job promotion there is without having to factor someone else into your decision. It's great!!! Enjoy it and take advantage of it while you can.

It's about YOU right now. Just look at your other girlfriends with a partner and maybe even kids. As great as their lives maybe, trust me, they are just a little envious of your independent and wonderful selfish lifestyle. Go get 'em girl. And remember...

MAN IS HUNTER.